Child free couples, STOP taking these things for granted

Child free couples, STOP taking these things for granted

Today, I have to decided to write a post not for my usual demographic. This post is not here to offer advice and solidarity to other parents as is the norm here at Naptime Natter. Child free parents, I am speaking to you. Have you got babies on the brain? Maybe you are trying to conceive or are already expecting your first ever little bundle of joy, I am here to offer you a friendly reminder to start appreciating what you now probably consider ‘the little things’. Once your gorgeous baby comes along, all these day to day activities will suddenly not be as simple as they once were and when you hear parents say things like ‘going to Tesco on my own feels like a spa day’, they are not being dramatic, it’s the truth. Don’t think of this post as a mum moaning about life with kids, think of it more as a bucket list of things to enjoy now while you still have the chance. I love my kids but, I am not going to lie to you, it would be nice to not have to use the toilet with my little ones either watching or sat on my knee.

Child free couples – STOP taking these things for granted

Mornings:

  • Waking up when you are ready to, not to the sound of crying
  • Lie ins that last past 9am
  • Eating your breakfast when you are hungry and not at break neck speed between nappy changes and feeds
  • Having a shower without an audience and without little people who you have just dressed trying to climb in with you
  • Drinking your first coffee/tea of the day when it is still actually hot
  • Not having to clean up someone else’s poo (probably more than once) before you leave the house
  • Lazily sprawling on the sofa watching TV (I am talking Game of Thrones or something, NOT Mr Tumble or the Teletubbies)
  • Having a wee in peace

The day-to-day 

  • Making the food you want to eat and not having to always alternate between the only 3 meals your child will actually eat
  • Having a wee in peace
  • Not having to spend your days in chaotic soft play centres or at the playground
  • After bills/rent etc, spending your money on whatever you want
  • Never ever having to watch Peppa Pig
  • Having meaningful adult conversations as opposed to chats with other parents about baby poo, sleep deprivation and how rubbish life would be without baby wipes
  • Knowing the clothes you put in on the morning won’t have to be changed my mid day as no one will have rubbed their snot/poo/chewed up food on you
  • Being on time for all your appointments/meetings/catch ups with friends
  • Not knowing all the words to the Paw Patrol/Mr Tumble/*insert name of other awful kids tv show here* theme tune
  • Reading books written for adults, as opposed to books that have more pictures than words and have riveting storylines such as: learning to count to 10, learning the colours of the rainbow, my first ABC and so on.

Leaving the house

  • Leaving the house when you want to leave the house
  • Not having to say ‘can you get your shoes on?’ 3476 times before you make it out the front door
  • Being able to just get yourself sorted, with ONE bag before going out, instead of having to pack a changing bag the size of a small suitcase so you can make it through the day
  • Having an empty car boot, not one with a pram almost the size of the boot itself squashed inside
  • Getting in the car, putting on your seatbelt and just driving away
  • Never having to go through the ordeal of trying to strap an angry toddler into their car seat
  • Not having a clue about the rear facing/forward racing debate that is always raging amongst the parenting community
  • Listening to the radio/your music in the car, not The Wheels on the Bus on repeat
  • Enjoying your drive time, instead of listening to your child moan that they are bored or the crying from your baby who is hungry/tired/just fancies a cry
  • All your passengers having control over their bladder and can wait happily for the next service station

Shopping 

  • Going to the supermarket to buy food and being able to buy whatever food you fancy, not a packet of Pomme Bears or kiddie yogurts in sight
  • A bottle of milk lasting way over a week
  • Not having to buy milk every other day
  • Listening to podcasts/music while you shop
  • Taking your time browsing the aisles
  • Not having to listen to a little voice saying ‘I want this/I want that’
  • Not having to deal with a screaming child when you refuse to buy them this or that
  • Walking up stairs/going up escalators in the shopping centre instead of waiting a century for the lift
  • Having a coffee break between browsing the shops
  • Actually having fun clothes shopping instead of thinking, ‘I hate my body now’ or ‘Will this pram fit in the changing rooms?‘ or ‘Why did I think bringing a two year old shopping was a good idea?!
  • Not even having to consider getting your boobs out in public
  • Spending money on what you want, not on bribes for the toddler to get back in the pram or a piece of plastic tat that your child is trying to shoplift

Going out

  • Not having to call a meal out together or a trip to the cinema ‘date night’
  • Being able to do the above every night of the week if you wanted (bank balance depending)
  • Spending all day getting ready if you want, instead of trying to do it frantically in half an hour after the kids have gone to bed so you don’t miss your reservation
  • Knowing the outfit you’ve picked for your night out hasn’t got a sneaky bit of baby sick down the back of it
  • Not worrying about your boobs leaking everywhere half way through your date
  • Not having to disappear to the loos half way through your date, armed with a breast pump, to avoid the above
  • Being spontaneous and going out for a drink after work
  • Never having the stress of trying to find someone to babysit
  • Spending your night enjoying yourself instead of checking your phone every 5 minutes incase the babysitter has text
  • Not being too tired to have sex when you get home after a romantic evening
  • No hangover fear (you might get it a bit now but, trust me, the fear is 100 times worse when you know you have to look after kids the next day)

Holidays

  • Booking a hotel because you think it’s nice, not because the reviews on TripAdvisor praise it for being ‘family friendly’
  • Going to countries that are over a two hour plane journey away
  • Spending your days sunbathing by the pool
  • Spending your days reading/floating on a lilo at the beach, not building sandcastles and trying to stop a baby from eating said sand
  • Making the most of an all inclusive holiday and getting drunk every day for a week
  • Doing things like scuba diving/hiking/exploring ancient buildings and being able to spend the time reading about the history
  • Having just one type of suncream in your bag (and it probably won’t be factor 50)
  • Relaxing

Evenings

  • Spending your days getting work/chores done so you actually have time to relax in the evenings
  • Never having to experience the confusion that comes with watching an episode of In the Night Garden
  • Not knowing all the words to the Cbeebies Goodnight song
  • Having no clue what parents are on about when they refer to ‘the witching hour’
  • Not having to go through the ordeal of a witching hour (or hours, ours is usual 5-8pm!)
  • Not having to cram all your hobbies/tv watching/reading into a 3 hour window every night
  • Staying awake past 9pm
  • A late night being an actual late night, not bed by 11
  • Staying parked on the sofa/engrossed in whatever you are doing all evening instead of having to get up multiple times to retrieve a dummy from under a cot or take a sleep dodging child for their tenth wee of the evening
  • Not being too tired to have sex

Nights

  • Getting a good eight hours sleep
  • Sleeping through
  • Never having to clean up someone else’s poo in the pitch black
  • Only having to deal with the sounds of snoring (maybe) and not a crying baby
  • Knowing you are not going to have to get out of bed atleast 3 times to see to a hungry baby before 3am
  • Never having to try and breastfeed in the dark or stumble around downstairs making a bottle when you’re still half asleep
  • Having sex if you feel like it, knowing you won’t wake anyone up
  • Being clueless to the fear that comes when you go to bed and you just know the baby is going to start screaming the second your head hits the pillow
  • Not wanting to scream when your other half says ‘did you sleep well?’ in the morning
  • Knowing once you close your eyes you are probably not going to have to open them again until your alarm goes off (in the actual morning, I mean, post 5am morning)

The ’emotional’ stuff

  • Only feeling guilty about things that can be justified, not ‘I’ve ruined his life for giving him a dummy’ or ‘I am an awful mum for not breastfeeding’.
  • Never experiencing the judgemental tuts or stares from strangers: these happen all the time when you give your baby a dummy/breastfeed/bottle feed/shout at your child/use a baby sling/let your toddler watch Peppa Pig on your phone etc etc.
  • Seeing your partner as the most special person in the world
  • Being confident in most of your decisions and not doubting every little thing you do
  • Walking light as a feather instead of under the massive weight of responsibility you feel when raising tiny humans
  • Having time to nurture all your amazing friendships and not being too tired to follow through with all your plans
  • Daydreaming about your future baby and what life will be like as a parent

Phew! What a list that turned out to be. I love my boys with all my heart but there is no denying that life was a lot simpler before they were around. Who wants a simple life though, right? They are worth every single second spent in a queue for a shopping centre lift, day that starts at 5am and all the days that have started and ended in a tantrum.

Parents to be, I hope you have taken note and from now until you join us all in the parent club you appreciate all these things that little bit more than you already do. Before you know it all of this will be just a distant memory (but you wouldn’t ever dream of swapping back). So, share this post with everyone you know who is planning a family or has a little one on the way. To all my lovely regular parent readers, can you relate? What would you add to this list?

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child free couples stop taking these things for granted

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36 Comments

  1. Put it like that and it’s amazing we had a second child haha! My kids are grown but sadly you never gain those freedoms back fully – for example if it’s not the peri-menopause keeping you up at night it’s your ageing husbands snoring. There’s certainly something special about those pre-baby years xx

  2. June 1, 2018 / 9:37 am

    These are all so true! The checking your phone every 5 minutes to see if the babysitter has text; that sooooo true!

  3. June 1, 2018 / 3:31 pm

    So many of my pain points of parenting in one post. With teens and tween now, I have suddenly worked out it will never end as my late Mum used to say the problems just get bigger as they get older. Having said that now they are older I can go out with my husband from time to time but we have forgotten how to speak to each other! #BlogCrush
    Kate recently posted…Benefits of using free dating sitesMy Profile

  4. June 1, 2018 / 3:33 pm

    Thank you for the chuckle this Friday morning! The days when I’m not at home are the days I really treasure getting to take a wee in peace!!
    #BlogCrush

  5. June 1, 2018 / 6:48 pm

    This is so true!! My partner and I eat in shifts and yesterday he took her out in the pram while I watched the chase in my PJ’s and it felt amazing! And don’t even get me started in the sleep…… I keep trying to explain this to my childless friends!
    Marie Blake recently posted…Is my baby broken? Comparing myself to the other Mummy’s.My Profile

    • Melissa
      June 22, 2018 / 8:29 am

      I totally agree! This list solidified why not to have them.

  6. June 1, 2018 / 11:34 pm

    Child free couples sure do take even the most simplest, basic needs for granted. Some of what you mentioned gave me a giggle too Mum to Mum. I personally love it when people say you were right After they have their own children #blogcrush

  7. June 2, 2018 / 4:40 pm

    I could identify with so much on that list but my four kids are growing up – my youngest is 9 – so this morning I had a lie in until 10am! But then I had to take all 4 clothes shopping which added a couple of more grey hairs to my head – all my kids have strong opinions about their clothes!! I certainly didn’t know what I could appreciate before I had my kids but I also didn’t know what I was missing. I love having them around even if it’s hard work at times and I’m certainly going to miss them when they’ve left home. #blogcrush

  8. June 2, 2018 / 6:08 pm

    Hi Wendy
    I don´t have kids, so I just seen a few things of your list, when I visit friends and I always was deeply thankful for all these moments you described. After reading your post I will definitely even more thankful for that. Especially  Having a wee in peace 🙂
    Hugs and Kisses
    Bea

    • Melissa
      June 22, 2018 / 8:31 am

      Yep! I will NEVER take my chosen childfree life for granted, don’t worry!

  9. Lauren Davis
    June 3, 2018 / 1:58 am

    Thanks for sharing it really made me chuckle!

  10. June 3, 2018 / 2:43 am

    This is such an honest post! It’s crazy how many things you take for granted before you have kids. My daughter is currently 7 months old and I am mourning the times when I could go to the bathroom alone. Separation anxiety is real so I have to go to the bathroom with her on my lap. Mom life at it’s best. I wouldn’t trade it for the world though. Great post! #BlogCrush
    Morgan recently posted…The Best Summer Activities to Do with Your BabyMy Profile

  11. June 3, 2018 / 1:10 pm

    Very true. I love how long your list was! #Blogcrush

  12. June 4, 2018 / 11:34 am

    It really is amazing all of the little things you take for granted before having kids. I used to LOVE being able to just run to the store real quick for a few things. I avoid it like the plague now. My 5 and 2 year old helped me understand the true meaning of herding cats. lol #blogcrush
    Alicia Owen recently posted…Lactation Cookies (That Actually Work!)My Profile

  13. June 4, 2018 / 9:27 pm

    Fab list! Every couple pre kids need to see this. It’s wonderful having kids but life completely changes and those simple things! I wish I had made the most of the holidays and all day lay ins!!

  14. June 5, 2018 / 8:33 am

    So many true points. We love our kids but do remember the simple times where could just go away on plane at drop or hat etc.

  15. June 5, 2018 / 12:09 pm

    This is all so true but we can’t tell anyone … And even if we do, no one will believe us! It’s the little things I miss like drinking coffee in peace and not being asked why I’m trying on ugly clothes …

  16. June 5, 2018 / 12:46 pm

    I miss sleeping the most. Can’t tell you when I had a solid 8 last? But the hugs are worth it. #triumphanttales

  17. June 5, 2018 / 2:28 pm

    Wendy, you really covered all the bases! The seventh item under day-to-day reminded me of when I was a young “fashion-plate” and went to visit my brother’s family. When his wife and two little girls picked me up at the airport, she told the girls “No eating in the car this week. Aunt J wears nice clothes and doesn’t need to get sticky smudges on them every time she gets in the car!” 😀 #TriumphantTales
    Jean | DelightfulRepast.com recently posted…Fallue – The Traditional Norman BriocheMy Profile

  18. June 5, 2018 / 10:13 pm

    This is an EPIC list! Haha. You’re so right though – it’s the little things like deciding you want to go out and then just leaving without having to wait while everyone goes to the toilet (10 times) and loses their shoes and then won’t put them on, whilst simultaneously trying to pack a bag to cover any and every eventuality that may befall you at some point in the day. Haha #blogcrush
    Lucy At Home recently posted…7 Ways Blogging Is Like Being In The Royal Family!My Profile

  19. June 6, 2018 / 8:35 am

    Yes, yes, yes to all of these! Though I don’t have to watch Peppa Pig – she is banned in our house!

  20. June 6, 2018 / 12:37 pm

    Oh my goodness THIS – all of this! If only we could turn back the hands of time to appreciate it all now eh?

  21. June 6, 2018 / 9:30 pm

    Yes, yes, yes! I wish I had read this list before I had kids. Haha, things I took for granted when we were young and child-free. 🙂 This is a fun read even if I already have kids. It makes me feel normal!

    Btw, thank you for featuring my post on your host post for this week! I feel very honored. 🙂 #BlogCrush

  22. June 6, 2018 / 11:30 pm

    Haha all of this! Those without kids don’t know how good they’ve got it until they rock up and take over your life!

  23. June 7, 2018 / 12:23 pm

    We’ve gone through the tough stage of the newborn and toddler years and it’s really nice, starting to get some freedom back. It’s the best of both worlds! You can’t truly appreciate the highs without the lows x #DreamTeam

  24. June 7, 2018 / 8:02 pm

    ALL OF THIS!!! ALLL……..

    I love being a mum, but there is no doubting the fact that NOTHING prepared me for the lack of sleep, the lack of control and all the rest of it. I’m not sure I could add anything to that list though. I wouldn’t change being a mother for the world but I’d give my pre-mum self a good shake if I could over “I feel really lazy just hanging out, we should do something.” Good God woman, you’ll never have this moment eating a cornetto without someone stealing it again. EVER!
    #TriumphantTales

  25. June 7, 2018 / 8:56 pm

    Love it – my husband and I also took these things for granted when we were childless. Having a child changes your whole perspective and lifestyle #blogcrush

  26. June 8, 2018 / 3:04 pm

    Spot on Wendy! Ah the lie-ins and the peeing and shopping in peace – these are a luxury now!
    #TriumphantTales

  27. June 9, 2018 / 11:56 am

    Wow! What a list! Having been woken every morning for the past few weeks at 5:30am I completely agree with this and would love a lay in #triumphanttales

  28. June 10, 2018 / 2:30 pm

    What a great list and every single point relatable!!! Fancy being able to just decide to head out for dinner without needing a indepth plan!! I did not take enough advantage of my carefree,childfree days!!! #dreamteam

  29. June 10, 2018 / 5:14 pm

    I vaguely remember the days that didn’t include all of these things. Whilst I love my little boy very much, I think I miss the peace and quiet most of all. But having said that, I wouldn’t change him for the world. Crazy isn’t it?! Thanks for sharing with #TriumphantTales, we’d love to see you back again on Tuesday!

  30. February 16, 2019 / 8:32 pm

    Great post! It’s true that you never really appreciate the little things until you can’t do them anymore. Sleep is definitely something that I took for granted before I had a child. I didn’t know what tired was before!