Just another lonely mum

Just another lonely mum

A couple of months ago I was noticing a lot of talk online and on TV about loneliness and motherhood. Channel Mum launched their #YANA (You Are Not Alone) campaign, Holly and Phil had a chat about it on This Morning and The Duchess of Cambridge has recently spoke about how isolating motherhood can be. I decided not to share my thoughts on this as, to be honest, I didn’t want to upset myself by digging up all those feelings I try to ignore and plastering them here on the internet for the world to see. However, the point of all of these campaigns was to help bring mums together, to show them that feeling lonely is something that happens to so many of us once children arrive and there are lots of us out there looking for a mummy friend to share this crazy ride with. I am one of those people. So, in the spirit of honesty and to hopefully bring comfort to other mums feeling like me, I am going to share my story of loneliness in motherhood, fingers crossed I can make it through typing this post without bursting in to tears.

Loneliness in motherhood – my experience

I have always been someone who is happy with just a handful of friends. I never cared about being popular or not at school and as I grew up I was totally fine with having a few really amazing friends rather than a large group of not that amazing friends. When I moved to university this character trait continued, while most students were going off forming large buzzing friendship groups, I was more than happy being pals with a few people from my course and a few others I met in halls/through work. I really don’t need lots of friends in my life to be happy.

I do need some friends though.

Life without friends is, well, it is crap. This is something I never really knew until we moved away from Swansea in 2015. When Leo was born in August 2013, I braved a bumps and babies group when he was about 6 weeks old and immediately clicked with another mum (hi if you’re reading!). Our babies were similar age, we were a similar age and we seemed to just instantly get on. She was my first mum friend and Leo’s first year was definitely a lot easier for having her to share all the hardships of motherhood with. While in Swansea I also made a few other lovely friends through various toddler groups and I really was sad when I had to leave that network of lovely mums behind.

If you are pregnant or a new mum, please get out the house and go to baby groups – I can not stress enough how valuable that time out the house was as a first time mum. It is so easy to get caught up in an endless cycle of feeds, naps and nappy changes when you’re at home with a baby all day and it doesn’t take long for your house to feel like a prison. It may seem like hard work getting you and your baby out but the reward of adult conversation and potential friendship is worth it.

So, after knowing what it was like to have other mums to talk to, meet up for soft play or swimming or just invite over for a cuppa, I suddenly found myself in a strange town, where I knew no one just when Leo was fully embracing the terrible twos. This was a time when I needed a friend the most, I did seek support from my bloggy friends but I needed someone in real life too. I jumped straight into finding new baby groups as soon as we moved here and from our second week in this town I was attending atleast 2 different groups a week with Leo.

Everything felt different now though. There was no mum I immediately clicked with, everyone seemed to be so much older than me, quite cliquey and I just couldn’t seem to connect with anyone. It was even more difficult as when I did speak to someone I was often forced to run off mid conversation as Leo was trying to bite another kids face off or something. I could never give anyone my full attention as Leo seriously did just run riot for an hour, terrorising any poor child who crossed his path.

Another note for mums to be: go to baby groups when your baby is still a baby, I mean like a newborn who can’t crawl off/run away/attack other children, this is the optimum time for making mum friends. It is hard to form a friendship with someone when you are getting to know each other through 5 minute snippets of conversation.

I understand it takes time to form friendships but over 18months on, with another baby in tow, things haven’t got any better. Yes, the town I live in isn’t strange to me anymore and I now walk into a room full of familiar faces instead of complete strangers when we go to baby groups but it doesn’t stop me feeling lonely. I can honestly say sitting in those church halls full of other mums chatting to each other while I sit and dangle a soft toy in front of Alex’s face while keeping an eagle eye on Leo is the loneliest I have ever felt in my whole life. The concept seems strange, being in a room full of other parents who I should have loads to talk about with and yet I just don’t know what to say and I feel more lonely than when I am actually physically alone.

Making mum friends is such a struggle for me, I can do all the small talk – ‘Aww, how old is he?’ , ‘What’s his name?’ , ‘Yea, this one is 6 months and my older boy is over there, he’s 3’ – but after that I don’t know what to say. And it feels like no one else does either, or they just have no interest in making more than small talk with me. Sometimes it feels like I am the only mum in the room who is not engaged in conversation with someone else, I am the only one drinking my coffee alone while trying to have a chat with my baby (note: spending your whole day talking to someone who can’t talk is another path that leads to overwhelming loneliness).

There are a few lovely mums I do occasionally chat to at these groups and they are the closest thing to friends I have but I only see them at the groups and sometimes we are to caught up in what’s going on with the kids to speak. If me and the boys are bored on a non toddler group day or in half term, there is no one I can phone and ask if they fancy a trip to the park or something. I often wonder if I had more support and friends here would I have ever felt so depressed after my second baby was born? Could things have been different if I had friends to call on and ask round for a cuppa on those really low days? I don’t know.

I wish I was braver and could just strike up a conversation with another mum but past all the standard baby chat I just don’t know what to say. I am only 25, these should be my prime years for friendship and yet I have spent a good chunk of my twenties feeling like the loneliest person in the world. I do have friends, it is just unfortunate they all live miles away and getting together takes serious planning and usually someone’s baby ends up poorly or work shifts get changed and our plans end up being cancelled. Deep down what I want most is to rewind time and be living back in a place where I am close to the friends I already know and love. The friends I don’t need to make awkward conversation with because they have seen me cry, made me laugh hysterically or, you know, maybe even seen me throw up after one to many tequilas at the Sixth Form party (I used to have quite the social life!). I do not own a time machine though so if I want friends in my life, friends who I can see regularly, then I need to go out and make them.

I just wish I knew how.

Leo starts school in September, while I am absolutely dreading the thought of being one of the only mums in the playground stood waiting by herself, I am going to try and use this opportunity to chat to other parents. With our children finishing off the day in the classroom and with no need to scream ‘Stop that right now!’ in the middle of a conversation, you never know, I might just find a like minded mum to chat to. A potential friend who also loves a bit of Game of Thrones, maybe likes baking too, loves a coffee and a cake from Costa and is also totally winging this motherhood thing and just needs someone to talk to, I don’t think I am searching for the impossible.

I am sick and tired of feeling lonely. I love my boys wholeheartedly and, yes, my husband is my best friend but I can’t help but notice the big gaping hole in my life and the only thing that is going to fill that is friendship. What gets to me too is that, without sounding big headed here, I am a really nice friend to have. I am a good listener, I care about other people A LOT and, although I am rubbish at texting back sometimes, I think of my friends often. I always have time for others, be that just for a catch up over a cuppa or a 2 hour chat on the phone about misbehaving kids or marital problems. I like a girls night out as much as the next person and I would be so happy to chat about non mummy topics too, I seriously need to talk about the Big Little Lies finale with someone, for example. I just wish I had the opportunity to  be a good friend to someone new.

Have you ever felt lonely after having a baby? Do you struggle to make mum friends too? I would love to hear all about your experience, I know it can feel hard and maybe a bit embarrassing to admit to feeling lonely but I think if more us talk about it then maybe more of us will also feel braver to start talking to other mums too. Channel Mum discovered that 9 out of 10 mums feel lonely and are looking for a mum friend, that is a lot of people – I am clearly not alone in these feeling and neither are you #YANA
You can find this post linked to some of these amazing blog link ups –

Maternity Mondays | Marvellous Mondays | Posts from the Heart | #MG | Big Pink Link | Twinkly Tuesday | Dream Team | Tried and Tested | Blogger Club UK | Best and Worst | Family Fun | Cool Mum Club | A Blogging Good Time | The List Linky | PoCoLo |For the Love of Blog | KCACOLS  …and of course #BlogCrush, the linky I co host every Friday.

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47 Comments

  1. April 27, 2017 / 3:27 pm

    Oh Wendy, I have just sobbed my way through reading this! I wish we lived closer – i would totes be this friend for you! It’s a long, complicated story, but basically I was ill for about 6yrs in my late teens/early twenties and lost all my friends as they moved on with their lives.

    Now I feel like i don’t know how to be friends as a “grown up” because the last time i had a close friend, i was a teenager, chatting about annoying parents and boys we liked. Now I’m married with 2 kids of my own. Over the last few months, i seem to have clicked with one of the mums at the baby group i run, though, so fingers crossed…

    I’m sorry to hear you’ve had such a hard time and not found any friendly groups near you. I wish mums would take time to look their circle of friends and notice the ones who are sat in their own
    Lucy At Home recently posted…Oh Instagram, You Have Me Quaking In My Boots!My Profile

  2. April 27, 2017 / 9:23 pm

    This makes me feel so sad hun – I don’t know how to help you other than to say keep trying and don’t give up. Could you join a club that doesn’t revolve around kids? Sorry sounds so patronising but it might be a good way to meet other people in your area.
    For what it’s worth, even living in my home town surrounded by friends and family, motherhood can still be lonely, and the days very long.
    Keep going, and keep trying xxx
    Thanks so much for openly sharing with #coolmumclub
    MMT recently posted…#coolmumclub Linky week 63My Profile

  3. April 27, 2017 / 9:31 pm

    I am a very lonely mom. We move a lot – husband in construction. I have a very dry sarcastic sense of humour and we usually end up in small towns where everyone has been friends since pre-school so ‘new-commers’ aren’t welcomed with open arms.
    Blogging has helped me have something to do and a community of people to interact with but I know what you mean about having a ‘real’ person to share with.
    Chin up … we’ll make it I’m sure.
    #coolmumsclub

  4. April 27, 2017 / 10:33 pm

    Love, I know what you mean… motherhood is a lonely journey, despite being exhilarating, exciting, exhausting and all that, and a good support group/ friend circle can make a huge difference. Especially during those difficult phases/ bad days. Baby groups are a blessing – you are so right. I made some very cose friends through them too. However, I am moving house too next month and it’s all going to be so new – change of location, move from a 2 bed flat to a house, a new school for Little Man, and no friends near us. It will be a fresh start of sorts, and even though I am excited, I am shit scared.
    But I’m glad you’re looking at the opportunity to find new friends when Leo starts school… I really hope you do. A tight hug and we’re all here to give you virtual love, support and friendship.
    A very brave and lovely post… thanks for sharing.
    #BlogCrush
    Nicole – Tales from Mamaville recently posted…7 things you should know about co-sleepingMy Profile

  5. April 28, 2017 / 11:20 am

    It’s so sad that mum’s feel so lonely. I remember seeing a post on a forum once (many years ago, and before Facebook was a thing.) it was from a new mother who felt lonely like you, in fact she said many of the things you’ve said here. I replied that no-one should feel so lonely and found out that she didn’t live too far away and our babies were the same age. So we met up and become friends. I don’t find making friends easy but I did find reaching out to someone in need easier. I hope someone reaches out to you. I think it should be put in the advice for new mums…reach out to others, feeling lonely and friendless is just not nice.
    #BlogCrush
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  6. April 28, 2017 / 12:05 pm

    What an honest and beautiful post. I’m not a shy creature whatsever but when i had children it made me doubt evey bit of mysefl and i started to shut myself away. It wasnt until my firts on was 6months that i had a ‘what the hell’ moment and went to a baby group and blazened it out that i made a great group of friends. Cannot inagine life without them. You are doigm a great job going along to all these groups the way you have been feeling you have done eveything to put yourself out there. Dont give up. It just takes that ine converstaion with the right person to make a friendship! #BlogCrush
    pam lorimer recently posted…Parenting Fails No.289My Profile

  7. April 28, 2017 / 2:40 pm

    This is one of my biggest fears, I am very similar to you in terms of my friendships now. But I’ve already booked on to some baby and bump groups and hoping I can get set ready for when the little one is born. Thank you so much for sharing! #blogcrush

  8. April 28, 2017 / 2:43 pm

    Oh this is SUCH an important post.
    You’ve the best attitude though to grasp the schoolyard and chat.
    My eldest is 16 , my youngest 8 and only just this past year have I ‘made friends'(sorry sounds like I’M the 8 year old!!)with some school mums who are now invaluable even just for a cuppa or picking up the little one or just sending out a “aaarrgghhh these kids!!” message without judgement.
    I moved here to Manchester 9 years ago but never really had friends here other than a very small handful , my social anxiety killed that really but I can see now how much easier it would have been to just grasp the nettle and actively meet other mums.
    Sorry this has turned into a huge essay but well done on this post so , so many people will identify with it! #blogcrush
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  9. April 28, 2017 / 3:42 pm

    Hey there! You are not alone! I think every new mom feels this way to a certain extent! I know I did! On top of that, we lived in a new town where I knew NOBODY!!! I know it’s hard, but try to make conversation and relate! I bet you’ll make a friend in no time!!!

    Also…Let me tell you that sharing my blog with people helped me SO MUCH! It was freeing! And I receive SO MANY COMMENTS about how women feel the same way I do-they just don’t talk about it…keep that it mind! Don’t let yourself feel like an outsider! Everybody is going through something!

    Ok, rant over!:)) #BlogCrush

  10. April 28, 2017 / 4:36 pm

    This was a really brave post and I’m glad you posted it and kept it up, sending lots of love to you #blogcrush x

  11. April 28, 2017 / 5:22 pm

    Aww Wendy, It’s so hard isn’t it? I’ve always said and asked ‘how can something that is so common be so lonely – motherhood?’. I know everywhere is different but I’ve found that the mums that aren’t rushing off in the playground are the ones in a similar situation and perhaps looking for someone to talk to. Try suggesting going for a bru after the school run, you’ll also have school to talk about and all the activities they have! It may take a little while but you’ll find someone with similar interests. You can also talk about the loneliness as I’m sure every mother has experienced it to some extent xx
    #BlogCrush
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  12. April 28, 2017 / 6:22 pm

    What a well written post that made me feel very sad that you feel like this. It must have been hard for you moving area and leaving your new mum friend but do not loose hope! When your child starts school there will be other parents out there who don’t know anyone either. Perhaps make the first move and say hello. You never know they may feel so glad that you did. There will be parents coffee mornings and the like that you can join. Is there a playgroup or nursery attached to the school? If so could your child attend one morning a week for the last term to make school buddies? It may be tricky but throw yourself into school life and it will become easier. Also perhaps ask one of the mums from baby group around for a coffee one day….you never know they may be lonely too. Good luck my lovely. X #blogcrush

  13. April 29, 2017 / 8:20 am

    Oh this is an amazing post, well done you for writing it. I’m so sorry to hear things haven’t been easier since you moved from Swansea. You really hit the nail on the head in outlining the optimum time for making mum friends. I had a similar experience as I had a good group of local mummy friends when I was on maternity leave with my first baby, then when she turned 1 we moved to another part of London. I joined a music baby group but everyone seemed in a clique already, and the ones who didn’t I didn’t click with initially. Then there were the playgroups where I didn’t know anyone, added to that I couldn’t really make any plans for other days of the week as I had just returned to work 3 days a week…so it felt like when could I invite anyone round for a coffee even if I did make a friend! It was tough but I must say things improved a huge amount when I moved again to yet another town in London. Perhaps because my daughter was then 3 and started at preschool where I made a couple of friends. I also found people friendlier in this area. Now my daughter is at school I actually have several lovely friends locally as we’ve been here 5 years and I’ve had another 2 babies since (though 2nd maternity leave was so tough and I relied heavily on a Facebook mums group I created with old uni friends who had babies and lived miles away). You’re absolutely right that starting school is another great time to meet and bond with people. We have a mummies class whatsapp group which I started and I find it is a big help when looking for someone to spontaneously go to the playground with, or to find out what the homework is, or ask last minute if it is a school mufti day!! I have a suggestion. Would it be possible for you to ask around when you’re next at playgroup, if anyone would like to join a local mummies whatsapp group for little ones of a particular age? I’ll bet there are plenty of mums who would love to do that even if they might not appear to. If you can find the will to do it I bet even just asking one nice mum and getting a positive response (which I am sure you will as you sound lovely) will help you feel bolder. Wishing you lots of luck. Stay positive! #blogcrush
    Nat – Awaybies recently posted…Great Cotswolds Day Out with the Kids at BirdlandMy Profile

  14. April 29, 2017 / 5:38 pm

    Thank you for speaking up & sharing this. I’m 5 months into motherhood and too nervous to go to baby groups as I am so so bad at trying to strike up conversations! I too live far away from my friends – but thankfully we moved to be near family so I sometimes have them to hang out with or talk to. But I know how you feel. Being a Mum can be so lonely – especially if you aren’t in the community you grew up in! #coolmumclub
    Muffin top mummy blog recently posted…A new mother’s guide to mummy etiquette My Profile

  15. April 29, 2017 / 10:54 pm

    This actually made me cry. I feel for you but I also understand! Since becoming a mother I feel so anxious all the time. I’m slowly getting there as I’m sure you will too. #kcacols

  16. April 29, 2017 / 11:24 pm

    What a fantastic post and so brave of you to be so honest. I made some great friends when my eldest was born. I still remain firm friends with the one. The rest is a long story lol! I completely agree that once you have toddlers it is 10 times harder to make friends because you are constantly distracted!! I hope it gets easier for you, fingers crossed you’ll make some fantastic school mum friends 🙂 Thank you for linking up with #KCACOLS

  17. April 30, 2017 / 6:19 am

    I feel so sad reading this as I’ve struggled with feeling lonely second time around.
    I find it really embarrassing going up to people but I’ve really had to try, just so I can have adult conversations / people in the same boat as me. I’ve made one really close friend who tbh I didn’t think liked me at first but we’re a huge support
    For each other now. I hope it gets easier in the school years for you #blogcrush

  18. April 30, 2017 / 6:46 am

    Second time round it is so different isn’t it? There’s just not the same reason to hook up with people as you don’t have exactly the same babies or bumps… But I can promise you that the school run and playground will open up a new group of friendship opportunities for you! It feels so different to nursery, or baby group because you all have a common cause and kids who spend a lot of time together. Playdates become often and fun, even if you might have to pluck up courage to organise one… hang in there x #blogcrush

  19. April 30, 2017 / 4:34 pm

    Hi Wendy, I can totally relate with you.. I don’t have any mom friends and it also stresses me out because I feel responsible for helping my daughter have opportunities to make friends, too. I couldn’t join any groups when my daughter was an infant because we only had one car at the time which my husband needed to use to get to work and public transportation sucks around here. I was very isolated for the first 9 months after giving birth. After we got a second car, I managed to go to libraries for activities and tried to exchange numbers with other potential mom friends to hang out for play dates and stuff, but it all just seemed like effort was made by my part only.

    I wish I could offer some helpful advice, but totally in the same boat here. It’s a lot of the reason why I turned to blogging…to make friends. I hope you are able to find that one awesome new friend real soon! #KCACOLS
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  20. April 30, 2017 / 5:42 pm

    This made me feel so sad and totally took me back to my mum and baby group. There was a mum who was centre of attention and as we had met whilst in hospital she decided she didn’t like me. I found out they all met up and I was never invited I just felt so sad. Like you too I never knew what to say, still dont and I’m rubbish at small talk. This didn’t help me when my daughter went to school but I really hope you manage to make some new friends when you get to that stage #blogcrush
    Tracey Bowden recently posted…Fiction: The Secrets of SaltlakeMy Profile

  21. April 30, 2017 / 9:47 pm

    Motherhood is a really lonely job sometimes. I make a point of going to lots and lots of baby clubs and I always chat to people. It feels a bit uncomfortable speaking to strangers but I have never had a negative reactions from anyone when I have done so. It is really tough though. Good luck. Pen x #KCACOLS
    Pen recently posted…In defence of our broken homeMy Profile

  22. April 30, 2017 / 11:38 pm

    Motherhood can be lonely. Sometimes we really do have to take a big chance and open up to others though. My best friend of almost 18 years is a lady I met at antenatal class. When they had an organised get together after our babies were born she passed me a piece of paper with her number on and said she really wanted us to get to know each other better. And so we did. Without that moment of bravery from her, I would not have had all these wonderful years of friendship. #KCACOLS
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  23. April 30, 2017 / 11:51 pm

    Such a brave post, well done for sharing. I must admit I found baby groups a much different experience second time round. Even though my eldest was in school and I was going with one baby as before I just found it really hard this time and I could totally relate to that feeling more lonely in that room than at home on your own. Have you ever considered joining a church? I met loads of my friends when I found the right church, and genuine friends too. #KCACOLS

  24. May 1, 2017 / 3:34 pm

    I can relate to this. We moved to a new area and I never really made new friends to make up for the ones I’d lost until the Tubblet started school. School mixes it up so although some of the mum’s know each other already, others are in the same boat as you and most people seem on the look out for new friends. Hopefully you’ll meet some lovely people that way 🙂 In the meantime, keep at it. You never know who you’ll meet at the next group. Fingers crossed for you!
    Tubbs recently posted…BlanketsMy Profile

  25. May 1, 2017 / 5:20 pm

    It’s so heartbreaking to read this. If you lived in my town I would immediately invite you out to join myself and George tomorrow. No one should feel like that. I must admit that find talking easy but I find shutting up difficult so I feel I may push people away waffling crap or saying something wholly inappropriate.
    After ten years of living where I do now, I have only made friends since having George. Kids are a great conversation starter. Even pointing out little habits and saying what yours does and before you know it you are comparing them to game of thrones and you have a full blown conversation going. I found myself laughing and asking mums in the early days “do you come here often” It was an icebreaker and it also helped me to find out if I would see them the following week and be able to chat to them then. If they wasn’t then I could chat about where they would be.

    Just a little off topic side note, I found your post a little difficult to read with that side tab with the social media icons on. I couldn’t move it or close it. I was reading your post on a laptop. Just a helpful tip.

    I hope you find your place soon and please don’t be shy. Just smile and you’ll appear approachable and you never know, an equally shy and lonely mum might approach you and start a friendship.

    #KCACOLS

  26. May 1, 2017 / 8:52 pm

    Hi Wendy, many of your thoughts here echo my own. I, too, struggled to make friends when the kids were babies, and I suffered from PND which made everything worse. Things have improved since my eldest started school. You can’t help chatting to people at the school gate (i’m shy too and I have a toddler to chase after). Good luck and feel free to come and chat to me whenever (Kids Versus Copy) Cx #marvmondays

  27. May 1, 2017 / 10:02 pm

    Oh sweetie, motherhood can be ever so lonely. I really hope you find your tribe when school starts, I hear so many people say this is true for them. #kcacols

  28. May 3, 2017 / 5:12 am

    I don’t have any mom friends that I could get together with either. All the people I consider firends who have kids live far away. We text regularly but we rarely get to see one another. I go to the park and occasionally talk to someone but it’s mostly just awkward. I’m rubbish at small talk. I think I’ve accepted the fact that I’m in this without friends. What I can’t accept is that Peachy doesn’t have friends. So we’re at the park whenever the weather permits putting ourselves out there mostly unsuccessfuly. #KCACOLS

  29. May 3, 2017 / 9:39 am

    I’m so sorry to hear what a tough time you’ve had, I can definitely relate to it being a huge challenge to try and make friends when you have moved from your ‘home’. I was really lucky to find a Facebook group while I was pregnant of lovely, wonderful women who are there for support and a chat whenever I need. You are more than welcome to message me on there if you’d like me to add you to the group, we’ve got Mums from all over the country and they are starting to meet up so you may well meet someone you click with there 🙂 #bestandworst

  30. May 3, 2017 / 1:43 pm

    Just popping back again from #blogcrush. Motherhood can be such a lonely time. I know it’s hard when life is so busy, but after trying baby groups and not finding any friends there, I started volunteering at the group and suddenly people had a reason to come and chat to me. I got to know a lot more people that way. Maybe you could try offering to help set the toys up or clearing away at the end? I know there are no easy solutions, though, and I’m sorry that things are so tough – it’s not a nice place to be when you feel alone #blogcrush
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  31. May 4, 2017 / 2:57 am

    You are not alone in this feeling!!! I felt that way very much so when I had my babies. It can be so isolating. I loved being a mum, but gosh I felt so lost, so often. I would chat to other mums and even have visits but I just didn’t really fully connect. With Aspen I was just 27 and most of the other new mums I met were over 30, even 40, and none of my friends had even started a family, most were still single. But it has gotten so much better. I think after they start school we make more connections. But a big part of the change came for me when I really pushed myself hard! I am an introvert and always have felt not smart enough or interesting enough, I would always think that people wouldn’t really be interested in what I had to say. But once I just started blabbing on about whatever I suddenly found that others just started opening up too. So just start talking about whatever and trust me someone will totally relate to you and your interests. I have this amazing friend now and we just laugh so much together. Funnily enough we discovered that as new mums we both used to go to the same shops and same coffee place by ourselves just to get out of the house. Had we known each other then it would have been awesome, but instead we were both lonely. So I know there will be mums in your area feeling just as lost and faking happiness. Just be yourself, your blog is so popular for a reason, because you are so relatable!!!!!! Plus gorgeous! I know I can’t come and hang out, but if you ever want a chat I am here xx #mg
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  32. May 4, 2017 / 12:06 pm

    Such a brave, honest post. You made me cry! Beautifully written xx
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  33. May 5, 2017 / 10:45 pm

    Oh lovely, I really feel for you. Motherhood is hard enough without having to go through with it with no one to have a natter too. I’ve felt moments of what you’ve felt when I’ve been on maternity leave with our little ones both first and second time round. Those moments when I’m having a truly awful day and I just want someone to talk to, or moan to, or rant to..but everyones at work. It can be really hard to leave the house when you dont feel like you have anywhere to go to with the little ones, or when you feel like you dont really click with anyone at a group and so going feels more painful than its worth. I’ve definitely been there, and although I am probably not as isolated as you are as we have family close by (which I am very grateful for), I know just how dark those moments can be.. x Thanks for sharing such an open and honest post with us on #MarvMondays. Emily x
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  34. May 6, 2017 / 8:21 pm

    It is really upsetting feeling like you have no one in your corner, especially when you have a new baby and your brain is mega jumbled! The only people I speak to know is my partner, children and my mum. That’s why I’m so grateful for blogging and finding other people to talk to and relate to #KCACOLS
    Amie recently posted…Stay At Home vs. Working MumMy Profile

  35. May 7, 2017 / 10:26 pm

    Ahhh this is a great post. I felt exactly the same with my eldest (I didn’t even bother with baby groups with my 2nd). I had the same feelings and worries as you. Alfie is now at school and I made a conscious effort to chat to the to other Mums and now can say that I have found a couple of really lovely Mums that I meet up with and chat to, it’s fab. Just go for it when at the school gates and get chatting 🙂 Thanks for linking up to the #bestandworst please do stop by again!

  36. keepmum
    May 10, 2017 / 12:51 am

    Great Post.
    My eldest was also born in August 2013 and we moved around a lot too so I can deff relate to this. Virtual hugs & wine!
    p.s. sounds like we could totally be friends!
    #KCACOLS

  37. May 10, 2017 / 12:05 pm

    I can totally relate to this – I actually wrote a post last year called ‘motherhood – the loneliest of times’ and lots of other bloggers contributed their experiences, it made me realise just how common this is….but also really sad that we are all just wandering around together feeling lonely. I don’t have family nearby and I live in a place far from where I grew up so I don’t have old friends or a ready made support network. I did do an NCT class and if it weren’t for that i probably wouldn’t know anybody! I had no idea how lonely being a mum could be – but even groups were hard, Arthur started crawling at 5 months so I had very little time to just sit and relax at group events, and then when he went through the biting stage it was even harder. I’m still not sure what the answer is – I have number 2 on the way and I do worry that ill struggle even more than before x #kcacols
    Sarah – Arthurwears (@arthurwears) recently posted…Decorating Arthur’s bedroom…so far…My Profile

  38. May 10, 2017 / 12:10 pm

    I wish I was nearer to come and give you a big hug! I was 19 when I had my first baby and I felt isolated. I gave up with baby groups as everyone was older and didn’t talk to me. I felt like an outsider. Things were different with my second baby. I was 26 and made myself get involved with groups and I made some lovely friends. Nowe at 11 my daughter still walks to school with friends we met at an under ones group.
    #KCACOLS

  39. May 10, 2017 / 9:46 pm

    It’s something I worry about with my wife. I do okay with the people I have in my life, as few as there are, but I know she is used to having more friends and family around her. #kcacols
    Bread recently posted…My Sunday Photo – 7th MayMy Profile

  40. May 11, 2017 / 9:48 pm

    I definitely need to get out to at least one baby group with Littlest B – it’s just so hard having two older ones already #KCACOLS
    Crummy Mummy recently posted…‘Why I became an egg donor’My Profile

  41. May 13, 2017 / 4:34 am

    What a lovely post. I can relate to this as I have been through the same and it’s nice to read something like this. Well done! #kcacols