Today was Leo’s last day of play school. This morning was like any of other Thursday morning except for the fact that this particular Thursday marks the end of an era and is the beginning of the next chapter in Leo’s life. I can still clearly remember dropping Leo off for his first ever session at play school back in March 2016 when he was just 2 and half years old. Today he was there with all his friends, children he has only known just over a year, and together they celebrated their ‘graduation’ from play school with a little leavers party.
My baby is going to big school
How has this happened? My baby boy, my beautiful firstborn, is leaving pre school behind him and in September will be thrown into the world of full time education for the next 12 years of his life. He is ready for this, he thrives in a teacher led environment surrounded by other children to play with. I’m not naïve, I am not expecting it to be a completely smooth transition, Leo will only just have turned 4 when he starts school and while he is mature in some ways, there is an obvious difference between him and his older peers. I know Leo is going to love school though, we talk about it all the time and he is so excited to be starting ‘big school’ soon.
Leo may be ready but me? Well , I most definitely am not. I know it is a cliché but I just don’t know where the past 4 years have gone. I feel like since becoming a mum my whole life is on fast forward, it feels like just moments ago I had a midwife telling me to scoop my baby up out of the birthing pool. I can remember the day he arrived in the world so vividly in my mind, and I will never forget how our eyes locked for the first time and in that moment he changed my life forever. When I look into those same eyes now I still see my baby. I think even when Leo is 50 I will always see him as that very same baby, no matter how big and old he gets.
Delve a bit deeper into my blog and you will see that since having Leo I haven’t always loved motherhood, I struggled a lot when Leo was 2 and went through a biting phase and throwing serious toddler tantrums, I have often questioned if I’m doing it all wrong and have felt the unwelcome effects of ‘mum guilt’ on an all too regular basis. I definitely haven’t cherished every moment with Leo but I have absolutely loved spending my days with him. And now that time is almost over and I’m really sad about it. Come September our days will be dictated to by the school run, no longer will we have afternoons completely empty of plans, a blank space for us to fill however we want. There will never be a random Tuesday where I can just ask Leo what he wants to do with our day, where we can just stroll up to the library and read books and play and grab a cake from the coffee shop on the way home. We won’t be able to spend mornings lazily watching Moana and Lego Batman, eating toast and cuddling close. Education, new friends and exciting new experiences will begin to take over his life, it’s not a bad thing I know, it’s the way it’s supposed to be. I’m just going to miss having my best buddy around that’s all.
I guess today I am just feeling a bit sad as Leo leaving play school feels like the end of an era. It is the end of him bringing home ‘splat rainbow’ paintings, castles made out of empty cat food boxes and gifting me coco pops cakes and tiny bread rolls that he’s made during cooking week. We will never again excitedly open his tatty blue book bag to see what story he has picked today, he always knows what it is but likes to act surprised when I pull it out anyway. His school is on the same road as play school so it’s not the last time we’ll see it but when I picked him up today that was the last time we set foot in the building, unless Alex goes there when he’s older. I think it is only natural to feel this way when a chapter in life comes to an end, I can only hope Leo isn’t feeling as sad about it all as I am.
Looking at Leo now it is amazing to see how far he has come and how much he has grown in just 16 months. I am so proud of him, he has gone from a ragey toddler who got off on the wrong foot with the other kids by biting and snatching toys to now a polite and friendly little boy with a group of friends and brilliant relationships with all the staff at his play school. He still has his moments, he’s not perfect but then who is? The thing is though, play school really helped him learn how to deal with his emotions, to understand how to get on with others and it has sparked his curiosity and interest in the world around him. I will always be grateful for the staff there for helping to shape my little two year old into the absolute joy of an almost 4 year old he is now.
As for Leo, I could not be prouder of him if I tried, he is amazing in every way and I am so excited to see him start his new journey into the world of primary school. Until September comes around though I will be making the most of the summer holidays, 8 weeks of no plans and our final chance to take on each day in whatever way we fancy. No school run schedule to abide by or need to rush around. I am sure there will be times where I feel like I’m running on summer holiday survival mode but I am not ready to let go of my baby just yet, I am determined to cram in as much quality family time during the summer as possible.
It’s been an emotional day, has your little one finished play school or nursery today? Maybe you have a child about to finish primary school or maybe one who’s about to graduate university – I would love to find out how you feel as your child gets ready to their next step towards their future.
Maternity Mondays | Marvellous Mondays | Posts from the Heart | #MG | Big Pink Link | Twinkly Tuesday | Dream Team | Tried and Tested | Blogger Club UK | Best and Worst | Family Fun | Cool Mum Club | A Blogging Good Time | The List Linky | PoCoLo |For the Love of Blog | KCACOLS …and of course #BlogCrush, the linky I co host every Friday.
Find me on Twitter ..
Thanks for reading, if you enjoyed this post I would love for you to share it 🙂