When motherhood is good, be sure to cherish it

motherhood is good

Having kids, it’s hard work. Unfortunately, you do not truly understand just how hard raising little people will be until you are thrown straight in at the deep end on the day you bring your first born into the world. It is so easy to let the tough times get you down: the sleep deprivation, feeding troubles, sickness, tantrums, poo explosions – I could go on. Parents can go days (sometimes weeks or months) at a time dealing with one baby related issue after another. Does this sound familiar to you – you worry about feeding your newborn/you eventually establish feeding your newborn, you worry that you’ll never sleep again/your baby eventually starts sleeping through, you worry their not reaching their milestones quick enough/they start smashing their milestones and you couldn’t be prouder, you worry they will only ever eat mashed banana or beige food/they slowly start eating more fruit and vegetables. It is never ending!

When you are trying your absolute best to bring up your kids it is hard not to let the worry, the child related dramas and just the sheer relentlessness and responsibility of being a parent get you down. That is why when parenting is good we need to hold on to those moments, we have to cherish them. Before you start telling me I need a reality check, I know sometimes being a parent can feel just too hard to bare (I have been there, so many times!) and I whole heartedly do not subscribe to the ‘cherish every moment’ thing; often when both my kids are being little horrors I feel the total opposite of #blessed. But the goods times? All those special, wonderful and magical moments we share together as a family? I treasure them as if they were a chest full of gold, I hold on to them tight and never ever forget about them.

When your life is made up of 75% dirty nappies, toddler tantrums, meltdowns at the dinner tables, wiping snotty noses and giving your all to the little people you created, leaving barely any energy and time left to look after your self, when things do start going right and everything feels perfect then you better had cling on to those good times with all your might. It can be hard sometimes when you are just trying to make it through the day in one piece to focus on the happier moments; dealing with a poonami at 6am after only four hours of broken sleep can make it almost impossible to remember all the positives that come with having children.

motherhood is good

Some days it just feels like for every hug your little one gives you they give ten more screams of ‘no!’ and you can easily convince yourself motherhood is just too hard. This is why when we have a lovely family day out, when Leo tells me he loves me, when we play games together at home and Alex is giggling and playing happily, I try my absolute best to etch their smiling faces into my mind and to bottle up that happiness.

Life with kids is all swings and roundabouts, it has high and lows, peaks and troughs. I know that if I didn’t recognise and hold dear the good times, I could all too easily let myself sink into a life of self doubt, worry and convince myself my kids are just trying to make me cry and probably hate me. So when Leo gives me an extra tight hug and whisper of ‘I love you mama’ , when we have a fun and exciting family adventure or the baby sleeps all night and wakes with a smile, I savour those sweet moments and lock them away in my heart.

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On Saturday we had a perfect afternoon out at a National Trust property and I’m not exaggerating, it was perfect. I took photos to remember the happy faces but I also put the camera away to be more in the moment and truly soak up these happy times. The fun we had on the weekend and every happy moment we’ve had before and since are the ammunition I need to get me through the challenges being a mum of two throws my way.

So, no, don’t put pressure on yourself to cherish every single moment of being a parent, you’re just setting yourself up to feel guilty and like a failure. But when being a mum is good, and it is bloody brilliant a lot of the time, hold on to those moments so next time you are trying to get a teething baby off to sleep at 3am or calm your toddler who’s throwing yet another tantrum, you’ll be able to call on the happy memories to help see you through.

motherhood is good

I know you don’t need me to tell you to enjoy time with your kids, of course you do that already, but I also know that there have been countless times I would have appreciated a gentle reminder to think about all the happy moments from my life as a mum. There have been times I have felt like the whole world was on my shoulders, fearing that every parenting decision I have ever made has been wrong and I would have loved nothing more than for someone to stop my negative train of thought by telling me to think of a beautiful family memory instead.

Saturday morning started with my four year old having a meltdown over the inadequate amount of honey on his pancakes at breakfast, but our afternoon out together as a family made me forget all about the arguments. Running around that beautiful garden with both my babies giggling, that to me is what true happiness really feels like and I don’t think I have ever felt more content.

Do you cherish every moment of family life? Do you think it’s even possible to love every moment of motherhood? What is your favourite memory, the one you can always count on to make you smile on a difficult day?

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15 Comments

  1. November 22, 2017 / 6:12 am

    Nothing beats seeing and hearing my husband and our 8 year old have fun together. They’re totally on the same wavelength and I love seeing them in their own little world. (one that I’m so grateful to be able to observe and just leave them in their bubble sometimes). It’s those time that I wouldn’t change for the world. Our daughter is at a point where she tells me she loves me and that I’m beautiful without me saying it to her first. Beautiful moments! #mg
    Carol Cameleon recently posted…How I find balance in life with my daily routineMy Profile

  2. November 22, 2017 / 8:58 pm

    Totally agree with you. Parenting is hard so we should cherish those moments when all is good. That’s what fond memories are made of. They make the hard times more bearable x
    #dreamteam

  3. November 23, 2017 / 7:31 am

    Oh this took me back, I can tell you. I remember those days well, but you’re so right, you need to cherish those good times because they pass by so quickly. #coolmumclub x
    Lisa – Little Orange Dog recently posted…Celebrating Wednesday’s #27My Profile

  4. November 23, 2017 / 8:20 pm

    You are so right Wendy…sometimes a chase and a giggle can erase the worst of mornings! Thanks for the reminder, and thanks for linking to #coolmumclub
    MMT recently posted…#CoolMumClub linky week 84My Profile

  5. November 24, 2017 / 7:46 am

    I don’t t think it’s possible to love every minute of everything, but you are so right that we need to cherish the moments! #DreamTeam

  6. November 24, 2017 / 8:44 am

    You’re so right! Easy to get dragged down/along with the relentlessness of parenting but so so important to focus on the positives and those precious moments. Lovely uplifting post #blogcrush

  7. November 24, 2017 / 9:16 am

    This is such a great post and you right having kids are hard work as we are responsible for those little souls. But it is so rewarding and to be able to do things with your kids is great but then there are also times when you just want time out. My husband always say that having kids that can scream and run around are a blessing as there are some parents whose children are wheelchair bound and can’t talk. So I am so grateful that we have been blessed with with healthy kids. What gives me the most pleasure is when I come home from work and my kids come and hug me when I get out of the car – so many kisses flying around. It feels so good knowing you are coming home to that as many just come home to an empty house.#Blogcrush

  8. November 24, 2017 / 12:17 pm

    I remember having a baby after a 16 year gap and it felt like starting all over again, breast feeding in the middle of the night when all I wanted to do is sleep. Then one night I was sat up in bed for the umpteenth time and the curtains were open and I could see flakes of white snow falling against a moonlit sky and it was beautiful. I looked down at my gorgeous baby girl and made a promise that it didn’t matter how tired I was these moments were to cherish. Good and bad, the moments of childhood are all too fleeting. x I love this post
    #blogcrush
    Anne recently posted…Word of the Week – FracturedMy Profile

  9. November 25, 2017 / 8:37 am

    You’re absolutely right. There is so much crap that comes with parenting full time and so many hard times that it cane easy to forget those special bits. But my goodness when they happen it makes everything else pale into insignificance and you do actually feel blessed – it’s OK to admit that too. #thatsatsesh
    Tammymum recently posted…Martinhal Sagres; In The Never Ending Quest For The Perfect Family HolidayMy Profile

  10. November 25, 2017 / 7:20 pm

    This is a great pep talk. It’s true that life has it’s imperfections and motherhood isn’t all glossy. There are moments of being tested and there are pure moments of joy. #mg
    Helena recently posted…DIY Christmas Card Display HolderMy Profile

  11. November 27, 2017 / 3:31 am

    This brought back memories of a day when Adam was around 6 months, April had just turned 3 and Aspen was almost 6 and we played in one of beautiful Melbourne Gardens with April dressed with fairy wings and Aspen in her Mermaid costume. I remember Steve holding Adam above him and his little dribbly mouth with his big grin. I had forgotten that memory until I read this so thank you! Over the years some moments have felt like the worst, but you are so right, this happy moments are something we have to hold tight too! #mg
    Mackenzie Glanville recently posted…finding tradition #mummyshotMy Profile

  12. November 27, 2017 / 10:18 pm

    I love this post Wendy… you have expressed all the emotions of motherhood beautifully. It’s so true, when it’s bad, you feel like you can’t do this any more but when it’s good it’s amazing and all so worth it!
    #coolmumclub

  13. November 28, 2017 / 8:05 pm

    #thesatsesh I disagree, i think we all need to hear this message – to be reminded. Often posts I write aren’t anything anyone doesn’t already know, but i think we need reminders. I promise to commit to being more present in the next few weeks, because you are right – memories are so important. Thanks for joining us x
    fridgesays recently posted…Be happy, it drives people crazy.My Profile

  14. November 29, 2017 / 2:57 pm

    Love, love, love this post and the oh so mindful message. It’s certainly unrealistic to cherish EVERY moment – we must experience the rich tapestry of our days after all. But we can do our best to hold on to those moments that are special even if they are just seemingly ‘ordinary’ too. The photos are gorgeous and really show the joy you were having at the national trust place. Really super – I love the message of this post. xx #thesatsesh xx
    Hayley@ Mission: Mindfulness recently posted…PointShoot Post #13: Little StreetMy Profile

  15. November 29, 2017 / 9:46 pm

    I definitely don’t love every moment! But I do try and bank the good memories. My favourites are when we’re playing together or having ‘squeezy cuddles’. Even some of the tantrums are cute in hindsight!! #BlogCrush

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